"The Kobayashi Maru: Captain Kirk Would Play This Card. Then Cheat."

"The Kobayashi Maru: Captain Kirk Would Play This Card. Then Cheat."

by:

Virgilio F. De leon Jr. MD

The Kobayashi Maru scenario has long been one of Starfleet's most infamous tests. Designed as a no-win situation, it challenges aspiring officers to face an impossible choice and reveals their true character when everything goes wrong.

Naturally, the captain who famously beat this test was none other than James T. Kirk.

How did he do it?

He cheated.

Well, according to the story, Kirk reprogrammed the simulation because he refused to accept that a no-win scenario had to remain unwinnable. He found a way to beat the system, and as his later adventures would demonstrate, the Klingons eventually had good reason to think twice before engaging him in battle.

I feel like an old man telling this story while introducing this card, but bear with me. There is a point to all this nostalgia.

The Kobayashi Maru Scenario is essentially Demonic Contract, only blue and considerably cheaper in mana.

The premise is delightfully cruel. You are presented with choices, but regardless of what you pick, things eventually end badly for you. It is the sort of enchantment that makes you question whether the card designer has a personal grudge against your enjoyment of the game.

Of course, there are ways to get around the problem. If you can hand Demonic Contract to an opponent before you've exhausted its options, you can turn a dangerous bargain into someone else's headache. The same general principle applies here: find a way to pass the consequences to another player before the situation becomes irreversible.

And that is where the fun begins.

If you're playing Dimir in Commander, you could run both cards as redundancy for this particular brand of mischief. After all, why settle for one questionable contract when you can have two?

Just remember that these strategies require the right setup. You need a way to transfer the enchantment and a plan for dealing with its consequences before they catch up with you.

But isn't that what Commander is all about? Finding creative ways to turn terrible situations into someone else's problem?

Captain Kirk would approve.

He would probably reprogram the card, too.

And if your opponents complain that you've broken the spirit of the game, simply remind them that Starfleet's greatest captain taught us an important lesson:

Sometimes, the only way to win a no-win scenario is to refuse to play by its rules.